It’s a sad tale that I’m afraid many of us know too well. After weeks and months of fighting with your hair, you feel you have made zero progress with, hair and have spent triple your net worth in hair products and slaved away for hours detangling and moisturizing. This is a familiar story and it’s one you aren’t going through alone. All of us have gotten to the point where were ready to go Edward Scissor Hands on our insubordinate manes. This post is for you, if this is an accurate visual representation of what you’re going through (caution: video is hilarious)
It may sound easier to slap a relaxer in it, keep it straight, or wear wigs or weaves, but taking care of your natural hair has its own rewards. Eventually the relaxer wears out and you’ll have to take the weaves out and you’ll be staring back at your natural hair once again.
Before you give up on your natural hair, here are some things you can do to turn things around to and to think about:
You’re Doing Something Wrong
If you’ve been natural for a while and are not seeing any progress in your natural hair, you are either doing something your hair doesn’t like at all or you need to change up your method to something that is better for your hair needs. In other words, something’s got to change. In order to figure out what to change, write down your hair troubles. Then in a column next to it, write down your routine and hair products being used. Does your routine or hair products used actually address your hair issues? Do you need to limit the amount of leave in you put in your hair? Do you need to put more leave-in in your hair? Do you need to look into buying thicker conditioner? Do you need to DC more often? Do you need to buy oils that are lighter? Should you be warming up your leave-in more often? Try to brainstorm some ways to incorporate what your hair needs into your regimen and write it down.
Natural Hair is a Journey, Not an End in Itself
The goal of natural hair is not for it to be long nor is it for your curls to be bigger. The goal is to have healthy hair. THAT’S IT. If you strive for healthy hair, the rest will follow. If you decided to go natural so you could grow long hair or have looser textured curls, you are setting yourself up for disappointment. Instead make it your goal to have the healthiest hair possible and make it look the best it can.
Stop Comparing Your Hair
The most common complaint I hear from naturals who are ready to take an L is that compared to other naturals their hair doesn’t look as good or as long. Stop that nonsense right now. I know you look up to and see lots of other naturals for inspiration. But there’s a difference between being inspired by something and comparing it to yourself. Being inspired means you’re learning from it and using it as a guide to better yourself in a way that is unique to you. Comparing means comparing where you are right now and using to negatively judge yourself. In reality, you are comparing yourself to someone who is further along in their journey or have a different journey entirely. Understand that your hair is unique and that you’re going to have to accept what it is no matter what.
Try Some New Things
If you feel stuck, try some new things! I’m not just talking about replacing eggs with mayonnaise in your DC. I mean really reach out into the big world we live in for inspiration. Just as a few examples, you can try South East Asian rice water, Ethiopian butter, African herbal treatments or Indian Ayurveda. There are so many things you can try and you really never know what your hair will like!